Day 11

Friday, May 30^th, 2014

           What a wonderfully chaotic day! Yes, note the paradox. Today, more than on previous days, I was rocked through a series of action-reaction-emotion that left me breathless yet feeling accomplished. “Hm,” you must wonder, “what might have happened that caused Se Jeong such waves of tumult?” Mu’s birthday party.

Mu’s actual birthday was last Saturday, but it was celebrated at Centro “2 de abril” today. It was originally set on this week’s Tuesday, but the therapists and I decided to push back the date. After all, what is better than ending the week with a nice birthday? Besides, it worked better for Mu’s mother as well.

You can imagine the impatience, anticipation, clouding the atmosphere of the center from morning to afternoon. In all truth, the feelings were emanating mostly from the therapists and me. The students appeared to sense something in the air, something that triggered an extra adrenaline push in the teachers, yet they seemed oblivious to the core of excitement (and stress). Well, all the students except one, Fr. Fr understands verbal language, and therefore knew we would celebrate Mu’s birthday. Thank goodness he is not a gourmand, because he is quick and strong, and would be impossible to bar from the stored food. The rest would blink at me as I briskly passed by them, heaving under the weight of enormous Disco bags cracking with alfajores, pasta frolas of dulce de leche or dulce de membrillo and pizza. The curious, hungry ones would try to sneak into the kitchen and steal a treat. Result: a constant eye with superhuman reflexes had to guard the kitchen.

Mu was calmer, much calmer, than he was yesterday. But calmer does not mean more hard-working. He exasperated Ana, once again, during his breakfast (exercise). After devouring cookies and juice (his favourite part), he refused to clean after himself (i.e. wiping the table and sweeping the floor). Even pushing and tugging is ineffective with Mu; he ends up running away at the speed of lightning, and once he sits down… it’s difficult to make him bulge. The therapists cannot suppress their laughter when they find me attempting, in vain, to lift Mu from the ground, losing my balance when he pulls me down beside him (which is his manner of telling me, “Stop bothering me and chill, Missie!). Mu reminds me of a grizzly bear, all cuddly and cute one second, grumpy and grunting the next. You know which exercise makes me chuckle of mixed amusement and exasperation with Mu? The repetition of vowel sounds, such as “aaa” and “eee.” Mu knows how to make those sounds (he always uses it to voice his irritation/boredom against us!), but he never wants to repeat after the teachers’ instructions. Instead, he starts to glare at the teacher who leads this particular exercise, to breathe heavily like an angry bull. After a couple days of observation, I came to a personal theory for his stubborn refusal. I feel Mu thinks we are making fun of him when we make the sounds. I feel Mu is smarter than the teachers judge him, and that he understands verbal language much better than they deem. That’s why I carefully choose my words around Mu (among a few other students). I do not want to make a mistake that earns his distrust.

The three hours of morning 1:1 sessions flew by. After forcing Mu through a couple of exercises for his registro until 10h30, Ana decided to leave Mu to himself. His constant escapades were his way of asking for attention, as he loves to be chased and dragged back to his stool. Though he has to work, it’s not good to reinforce his behavior all the time. Furthermore, Ta and Fe arrived at that time, turning our focus to them. Poor Fe! The moment he walked in I knew he was sick (I was confirmed by an SMS from his mother). He was even more affectionate and cuddly. I was helping him take his coat off, softly whispering words of comfort, and he leaned against me, motioning my hand to comb his hair. His bloodshot eyes and cough gave me a pang, because the sweetheart’s slumber must have been disrupted by the move. With Fe in such a state, and Mu so uncooperative, Ana read a short children’s book on a birthday party, “to initiate the mood.” Meanwhile, I concentrated my efforts on cutting/drawing Mu’s birthday card and decorating the dining room (as if prom’s had not been enough!). As I’m terrible at blowing balloons, it took me double, or more, the time someone else might take.

Lunch was a gift time for once! The students did not come one after the other (with enough time interval to make me rally from kitchen to gate every five minutes), belated because they were buying a gift for Mu with their mother or older brother. Br recovered from his depression, though he still yearns for attention all around. He came to sing and twist my fingers a couple of times. I tried to care more for Fe, who looked terrible. However, Si kept poking around the corners to gently lead me into his curtain corner. The biggest major conflict of lunchtime was fueled by the television. When, at one, I announced the television could now be turned on, Fr rushed towards me with “Monsters inc.” in his hand. Obviously, he was as sick and tired of Barney as the teachers were. But Br and Ta wanted “Barney.” In the end, we settled for thirty minutes of each, although we ended up putting the prior during the entire period.

After lunchtime, we had another story time, to hint at the birthday party that was coming two hours and half later. It was the first time the entire group was put together in the same room, and I understand now why it is not done more often. The students were uncontainable! And Al decided to have his hyper day today! The giant was giggling unstoppably; anything was the most hilarious thing that could happen! Well, at least I’m thankful he did not begin prancing around the room, and that he listens well to the direction, “Quietito. Quedate tranquilo.”

After story time, it was class time for an hour and a half. Oh yes, it can take up to an hour to read a thirteen-page picture book with these children and teenagers. The time it takes to make them sit– and stay seated –, settle down, read, catch and retain their attention… It’s a feat, a whole adventure entirely! I end up memorizing the book, because the pages are read and reread to each student, in the attempt to engage them. Me? I was with To. I feel all warm inside, because To is almost my own student. Since he began attending the center almost at the same time as I began coming, the therapists trust me to guard him. And having spent the most time with him compared to other teachers, I know his quirks and habitudes, and he grew to like me. He even comes to kiss me when he arrives! And one thing I realized: To is an angel until four (and I mean 16h00 sharp). After four, he turns into an unmanageable, restless beast who throws and shatters anything on his path. Luckily (for me), my time with him usually ends around that time, and I am put in charge of another group of students. But I find myself dashing behind him and catching him far too several times from 16h00 onwards.

A little after four, the therapists and I began preparing for the party. Ana and Lori guarded the children away from the kitchen while Josefina and I set the table for the party, heating up the pizza and pouring soda into cups. And wow, from that point on, everything is a rush in my mind! I remember running back and forth from kitchen counter to students, relaying cups and plates from table to sink. I remember washing dishes hurriedly, stopping momentarily to dry my hands and run to (try to) prevent a spilling accident, wiping the face and hands of a child. I remember shrieking when my hand on a stool and felt the unpleasant surprise of a puddle against my palm. I also remember my surprise at Ta suddenly vomiting from nerves and gulping down three slices of pizza and an alfajor. And I remember finally coaxing Mu out of the bathroom, which he visited more than ten times. (He was frustrated almost the entire day, because his stomach was upset but he didn’t manage to… well, you see what I mean. Thank goodness he could in the end. If not, his mood would have been clouded on this joyful day.) I remember glimpses of many moments from the next hour and fifty minutes (until 17h58), and none of them are of peace.

But yet, amidst the chaos and indoor workout, I feel happy. Because all the students (even Ta, I hope) had a good time. Though they did not really understand, they felt they were celebrating something important for Mu. (Only Jo was temporarily unhappy, because he was jealous and wanted it to be his birthday.) We sang “Happy birthday,” and Mu blew his candle. In reality, we lighted the candles four times. Once because Jo blew them; the others, because we could not get a good picture of Mu blowing his candle. Mu was blissful! Not so much because of the nine presents he received, but more so because of all the food he could eat at his leisure. Oh, he was contented, and his stomach was satisfied.

I had met all the parents at least once previously, but I properly had a conversation with them for the first time today. And I think they appreciate my coming to the center. Maybe it is because I spent time with their children. Maybe it is because I care for them, and love them. Maybe it is because they are grateful I grew affectionate of their child, and their children, in turn, like me as well. Whatever the reason, they were all very kind. And extremely talkative. I was caught by one after the other. All the things I heard! All so proud and defensive of their children. It really warmed my heart, their love for their sons really did.

And, at the end, just when I was leaving, I received a surprise gift as well. I had told the therapists my birthday was two weeks ago, on May 15^th, because I always got my age wrong. (It’s as if my birthday was too recent for me to remember I was eighteen when I first came to the center, less than a week after my birthday.) I was hugging Mu goodbye when the lights suddenly turned off and Josefina, Lori and Ana walked in chanting “Happy birthday” to me, holding a plate with an alfajorcito and a little wrapped present. I was so touched! Really, truly. Though small, I could feel their genuine attention and affection, and it really made me feel all warm inside.