Day 13

           I made a resolution: I won’t say I’ve had a nice and “quiet” day ever again. It is almost as if a comment on the calm and peacefulness of one day brings an impending disorder the next day. But the truth is, though I may sound as if I am complaining, I am happier of the turn of today. After all, more disorder does imply more adventures.

           Bo was sick, and I therefore headed directly to Centro “2 de abril.” The poor sweetheart! He has contracted pneumonia! I hope he will heal soon, quickly, and completely. Mm, it’s sad that I could not say goodbye to him, or see him one last time. But he probably has already forgotten me. Oh, all the goodbyes with the children are mostly for me, let’s just admit, Se Jeong. When I arrived, Pati was with Mu and Ta and finishing to read Orejitas el conejo. (Did I mention how cute children’s books are, especially with all the illustrations accompanying the storyline?) I kissed a sleepy and low-energy Mu and a crumpled-under-frustration Ta. In spite of Ta’s obvious grumpiness and angriness, he falls under the category of people who sit around sulking rather than, well, rant and break everything on his path. From this introductory scene, my expectations prospected another serene day.

At 12, not one minute more nor one minute less, Pati announced lunchtime. I had the leisure to digest while I ate. No relays from front door to table to microwave. No jerked reflex movements to salvage whatever needed to be saved, except for that one time when Mu tried to steal my lunch container right out of my hand and I had to spin around on my stool away from the gourmand (who had already gulped down his share). No interruptions. I wasn’t the only one who enjoyed the lunch privilege; all the therapists had the luck, the rare luck. After lunch, the director decided the children could spend much of the afternoon playing outside. It was a beautiful day, sunny, with a breeze neither chilly nor heated. Days with such a wonderful day always make me happy, and it seemed to cheer the therapists and students alike as well. Thus I spent most of the afternoon outside with the children, and sharing my goodbyes with Pati whom I won't see anymore.
So far, my readers must be wondering, “I don’t understand Se Jeong’s initial comment. Everything seems to be flowing smoothly.” How about this: the children were gearing up. They were following rules of fair play to allow the therapists and me to fuel ourselves, to have at least a meager chance to catch up with them, after they had engaged their game. Furthermore, I believe people may sometimes be contaminated with external influences, such as the attitude of a friend or peer. The effect is apparently valid for the students at school. One after the other, they filed in, the next wilder than the prior. The wildness spread like wildfire, and soon all were affected. Br was in his down mood again! I thought he had recovered, but I guess I thought wrong. He did eat all his lunch, alone, without any spoon-feeding; I am noting this as a good sign, because the most extreme stages of Br’s depression are marked by a dearth of all motivation and suppression of hunger, hinting at suicidal thoughts. Jo was in a fighter’s mood, anything provoked his spitting (literally) wrath. Al was, as always, relatively calm and happy, smiling at the air and giggling nervously every so often (“around you!” they tell me). Fr challenged Pati’s authority a bit too numerous times, but he completed all his assignments in the end. Thank goodness he did not regress to his violence! I really, really do not want him to be kicked out for a turbulence of anger and violence. Ta was thankfully in a lighter mood by this time (he was probably delighted by Ana's arrival). Fe did not come, for the second day in a row. Upon my questions, Josefina told me she had not heard anything from his mother concerning his absences. I just hope he is not awfully sick. To? He improved in his abstinence in throwing things at the school (at home is another story entirely. I am not included in family therapy though; mostly Josefina alone talks with the parents, along with another psychologist I do not know all that well.). But no, apart from his terrible compulsion, To was charging indoors and outdoors at a invisible red cloth. I swear, watching him reminds me of a bull. He even puts his fingers on either sides of his head, pointing them forward like the bull's horn, and slightly bending over to run around.

If I had been stunned by the boys’ ease at walking pants-less in the house, I was not in the least prepared to watch Si strip off his clothes and run around naked. As soon as he arrived, his shoes flew off his feet, and soon his socks trailed on the floor. Fifteen minutes later, as if in a rage, Si quite neatly pulled his pants, underwear, sweater, and shirt down and off. His peers did not really seem to mind; the few who noticed seemed amused, either laughing or pointing their finger at the dancing elf. I, on the other hand, did not know how to react. Not so much because I was uncomfortable. Dear god, no, I was pretty much used to seeing naked people in Centro “2 de abril” by now and grew quite immune to it. My source of discomfort stemmed more so from my uncertainty on how to react. After a brief thought process, I settled on ignoring and pretending nothing had happened (which turned out to be the good choice, Lori, Ana and Pati later assured). But in mind, I was trying hard to repress my instinct to immediately pick up the clothes and force Si to put them back on, a process delayed for around ten minutes. Apart from repeating the clothing removal show thrice (including once outside, in the backyard, where a couple of passersby threw us a “que te pasa, loco?!?!” glance before scurrying away), Si also ended up with a bloody nose and a self-inflicted scratch on his chin, and sipped disinfectant. I was the first to notice the injuries, and also the one who snatched the medicine bottle from Si’s hand. You cannot imagine my worry when I saw blood dripping from the little boy’s face, and my even greater horror when I realized the content of Si’s drink. Simultaneously, when I screamed a horrified “Si!” and (unintentionally quite aggressively) seized the disinfectant, Si pushed the bottle into my hand as he began spitting, disliking the taste of the medicine. Thank goodness for the automatic spitting, I suspect Si did not swallow any of the liquid. I’m not sure whether disinfectant is toxic or not, but I don’t want to risk anything potentially dangerous.

I think Si gave me the most shock of the day, maybe of the entire internship. I’ve seen other drastic accidents happen as well, but I was never at the core. But, to relieve the mood, let me expound briefly about To’s amusing behavior, his intentional wrongdoings for me. Each time he would drop or throw something to the floor, he would dash to me and call my attention. He tugged at my right arm, looked up at me with a cheeky smile, gestured widely towards the upside-down flower pot or bowl, kept tugging more. When I convincingly ignored him, he would even pull my face down towards him, holding the back of my neck and attempting to force me to pay attention to him, until Lori or Pati strode to free me. The therapists laughed watching his little routine. “Look at me! Look at what I did! Am I not so bad? Hello! Aren’t you going to scold me?” Lori, Ana and Pati had a fun time in inserting words for To’s enthusiastic hollow calling. Oh To, when will you learn to stop throwing things to the floor? *sigh* I feel as if, at this rate, I won’t accompany his first trip to the zoo with the people of Centro “2 de abril.”

In all truth, I’m all used to everything happening in Centro “2 de abril” now. No day comes as a complete novelty, because though marked and altered by new features daily, I have grown used to the freshness of every single day. I gladly await (and somewhat hope) for each new day. I am also pleasantly surprised at finding each day bringing more confidence and less doubt on my part, on my actions. Decide for yourself: how would you rate today? I say it was more chaotic than yesterday, but much less disorderly than other days. Would you agree?